With high fashion labels like “Hanes” and “Just My Size,” who WOULDN’T want to display them for all to see?


Mornin’ all.

I have two bureaus in my bedroom.

In one, I keep hard copies of the stories I’ve written, DVDs, and knives. In the other, I’ve got a random assortment of pillow cases that I haven’t used in 14 years, a few keepsake baby items from when the boyos were little, and an entire drawer of mystery cords and keys. I don’t know what they power or open, but I can’t throw them away because the moment I do, I’ll need them. That is how life works and you know it.

I also have a closet. It’s tall and long, but narrow, with a six foot shelf over a six foot pole. The closet is juuuust wide enough to hold the clothing on hangers from that pole, and the shelf is juuuust wide enough to stack neat piles of folded laundry on top.

I’ve got plenty of storage space for our clothing. So of course, my clothes are kept on cardboard boxes in the corner of the room. They’re folded and stacked in two large piles, a dusty one of clothes my man and I never, ever wear, and the other small pile contains the few things we wear when we’re not working. Our work clothes get hung up on the coat rack. Downstairs. Next to the front door. Duh. Where else would I hang them?

Every family has their quirks. Think back to when you were a kid sleeping over at a friend’s house for the first time. There was definitely something that family did that made you say, “whhhaaaaa? People DO that?”

When I was growing up, our family’s oddity was laundry. Dirty clothes were piled in front of the washer. They’d go through the wash and dry cycles, then be put in a clean pile on the floor in front of the dryer. Once in awhile, Mum would get sick of it and go through a “I mean it this time, we’re going to get this sorted and KEEP this sorted!” phase, which usually lasted about two days until one of us didn’t feel like folding the clothes fresh out of the dryer and began a new pile.

When I grew up, I decided I would be better at laundry, mostly because I absolutely HATE doing it and the thought of having to sort an entire pile that got out of control was nauseating. I figured that if I just got on top of it and stayed on top of it, no piles would grow.

That plan…it did not go so well. I vastly overestimated my interest in sticking to laundry commitments.

When we moved to this house fourteen years ago, I decided to finally do what I actually always wanted to do and get the laundry situation manageable. The new place was larger, and we actually had some space, so we picked up real bureaus. Nice ones, too…for the most part. One of the dressers in my room is coated in Pepto Bismol pink paint that I’m fairly certain is lead-based. We got it for free from the junk shop across the street, so I don’t mind the color, and I didn’t plan on licking it, so the lead paint wasn’t a drawback.

Fourteen years later, I still haven’t licked it. *knock wood*

I’m saying that I have plenty of socially acceptable storage space for our clean laundry. Hell, I even fold everything as soon as it comes out of the dryer. I don’t have a pile on the floor that would be excellent for hide and seek (…just sayin’), but I also just can’t take that final step and put it away where it belongs. In my room, it’s all folded on boxes. In the boys’ rooms, it’s on chairs. I’ve got linen cabinets in the bathroom, yet the linens sit on top of the dryer because why would I put linen in a linen cabinet when I could use that space for spare computer parts?

I’m looking at a move within the next year or so. Big changes in Le Chateau au Bethie have led to the man of the house now having to commute three hours a day. That’s not sustainable, especially in the winter. I’m beginning the process of cleaning with the intent to move, no small feat for a hoarder.

Here’s the thing, though. As I lay in bed unable to sleep at 3 this morning, looking at the dressers and clothes in the dim glow of the night light, I couldn’t decide if I should just actually be better at laundry, or stop fighting what is clearly in my nature and get rid of all the bureaus.

Bureaus are heavy and bulky. Tough to move. I’ve done well with the not-eating-the-lead-paint goal, but how long can I really sustain that level of self restraint?

Maybe I can just look for a place with built-in bureaus. That would solve all my problems. I could ditch the dressers and still have plenty of storage space for my DVDs, knives, and spare computer parts.

Ya know, I think I might just be on to something here…

Thus concludes a quick Musing for Wednesday, May 30, 2018. I wonder if they have a “built in bureaus for hoarders” tag on Zillow?


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