If you stick your hand through a portal to another dimension, what would you want to pull out?


Mornin’ all,

I woke up in the middle of the night with a burning sci fi question and it didn’t resolve itself through subsequent dreams. Thought I’d pop on here and run it by my fellow geeks. It’s pretty heavy, so you might want to shotgun that coffee first.

“Did YOU make the coffee, Bethie?”

Nope. Teen3.0 did, and he makes it the best out of any of us. It’s still that Maxwell House bullshit, but I’ve had a whole cup already and it hasn’t popped, sizzled, or wept softly once. ‘S good. Chug-a-lug, because I need all your neurons firing.

“*tentative sip* I feel a slight tingle…”

You’re just gun shy from the last time you were over, when the coffee gained sentience and claimed to be a dark overlord who wanted to eat your firstborn. Come on, down the hatch.

“*shrug* *gulp* Am I still alive?”

Truly alive for the very first time. Now, set the cup down, put on some smarty pants think-y glasses, and furrow that brow so I know you’re really giving this problem your all. Ready?

“Hrm, yes, quite.”

Ooh, beard stroking! Nice touch.

Okay, so here’s the question:

If the cosmic “you” was somehow able to reach into a different universe and pull from it an object to bring into our own universe, upsetting the balance of matter, what would be the logical result? Would something in our universe have to be destroyed to compensate? Or would our universe simply adjust and adapt? And if it would adjust and adapt, wouldn’t that still have a limit? How much new matter could be crammed into our universe before SOMETHING had to give? And how, exactly, would that straw break the camel’s back? Would things start imploding? Mini black holes? Or would there be a larger, more catastrophic collapse? How about dimensions? Are different dimensions part of our universe or part of a separate one? If they’re part of our universe, then moving one thing from that dimension to this shouldn’t matter in terms of, well, matter, should it? And how would one know that they’ve reached into a different dimension rather than a different universe entirely? Is there a litmus test? Any telltale signs that their thievery is only a moral problem and not an actual threat to the very fabric of the entire universe?!

*deep sigh of relief*

Boy, feels good just to get it all out! I have been chawin’ on this one for hours and my man, who is normally an incredible sounding board for these types of questions, was snoring so peacefully that I didn’t want to wake him.

Here’s the set up that brought about the midnight think fest:

I had a dream that “I” figured out a way to open a portal. Kind of standard sci fi. I didn’t know where the portal lead, but when I looked through, the world seemed very similar to our own. I didn’t actually travel through the portal, because apparently I am still a chicken in my dreams, but I saw a little table and screwed up my courage to grab it and pull it back into the field where I was sitting in this world.

“Hold the phone, Bethie. You had a dream where you could actually reach into a different friggin’ universe/dimension and take any number of strange, new objects, and you chose to bring back a TABLE?”

…I…well, the thing is…it’s just that…


Yes. Yes, I did. I stole a table. The first relic I chose to bring into this world from another was a table.


Can we stay on topic, please? The object doesn’t matter. I took something from there, brought it here, and then freaked the hell out. In my dream, I sat there next to the portal, holding the table and panicking.

See, a generally accepted theory is that universal matter is finite and must remain balanced. Matter is neither created nor destroyed blah blah stars-n-shit. Lots of sci fi works within this concept. Some does not. I’m trying to figure out which side of the coin is more plausible. And not just for a story. I legitimately want to know the answer.

I guess it would depend on a few key factors, huh? First, we’d have to know if there are other universes, or if we’re the only one. Then we’d need some sort of understanding on the nature of dimensions. Are they planes within our own universe, or do they indeed offer a way into another? And that whole matter in a delicate balance concept that geeks and brains alike tend to lean on…is that actually factual, or just an easier way to avoid the “then what the hell is churning out new matter!?” question?

So many layers. And all over a table.

It was a neat little table, though. When I was a kid, my Grammie had a huge spider plant which sat on a tall, thin white table with a mosaic inlay on the top. I can remember that little table more clearly than a lot of other memories from childhood because my brain is a silly organ that remembers the weirdest useless shit. Now, the table from the other dimension drew my attention just as that one did and…

…wait a minute.

Hang on now. Was I…I mean, did I…could I possibly have opened up a time travel portal instead of the inter-dimensional rift!?!? Is that what the dream was really about?

HOLY SHIT. What if that was the case? What if I was drawn to the table because I KNEW that table?


Dreams, man. Dayum. I’mma have to think on that one for awhile.

My questions still stand, though. No matter which message I was supposed to glean from the dream, I’d kind of like to know if there really is a finite amount of matter allowed in our universe. That seems important. If the answer is yes, then we know what we shouldn’t do. If it’s no, then we know all we can do.

And yes, I know a lot of big brains have been mulling this one over for a long time. I don’t think the brainiacs that do this for a living are going to crack the code and find the answers. I think it’s actually going to be solved by sci fi fans. I really do. Think about it. We’re not bogged down in numbers and the politics of respecting the theories of our colleagues. We’re not wrapped up in the rest of the scientific community. We don’t have a personal stake beyond our deep hunger, so we’re far more willing to look at all possibilities. We’re not driven by a paycheck, or a thirst for fame. We’re simply driven by the story.

And what better story is there than the universe itself?

Thus concludes a look into the abyss for Thursday, February 25, 2016. I’m off to contemplate the time travel twist while I clean my dining room. Yes, I’m cleaning the hoard. Or, trying to, anyway. It is shockingly a lot harder to UNhoard than to “rapidly acquire,” as Teen3.0 kindly puts it. Now, I don’t know if any inter-universal beings read my blog. But, if any do and they want to rip open a portal into my dining room and start taking relics, I’d turn a blind eye. Especially if you hit that back corner. Take anything you want from there. Hell, take it all. Consider it a cultural exchange.

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